In June 2008 SBH awarded me a plaque for the computer training I do. My cousin Dr. Victor Grazi is on the SBH staff and was in the audience.
I feel like a fraud accepting an award for something I love so much.
A funny story happened to me recently - People call me all of the time with computer questions and I try to help them as much as possible.
But this woman was really brazen calling at 11:30PM on a weekday night.
She said it was a real emergency and so I listened.
She told me it was her daughter and I thought oh no - she wants me to go to her daughter's house.
She told me it was in Lakewood and I thought oh no - she wants me to go to Lakewood.
Then she told me it was a virus and I thought oh no - she wants me to get rid of a computer virus!
And suddenly after about 60 seconds of this the incongruity of the whole conversation hit me - Do you want Victor Grazi the computer guy or Victor Grazi the Doctor?
I really love the training - I love when my students get that Aha! moment of understanding.
And I really love when they call me from their jobs to ask me how to perform some specific task.
But mostly I love when they call me to tell me they can't come to my class anymore because they found a job.
You guys should be very proud of your accomplishments - you find people, you feed them, then you train them and you find them jobs, and I think that is an amazing thing.
May your services never be required but as long as they are may you continue to provide them with strength.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Shabat Address to Magen David Sephardic Congregation in San Francisco - Sept 25, 2010
Potchin bekavod achsanya - This is the first time I have ever been away from my family for Sukkot and I was very sad to leave them for yom tov. But thanks to the Rabbi and to your congregation for your hachnasot orchim - this is one sukkot I will never forget.
We are in the days of Sukkot and the question begs to be asked - why do we sit in a sukkah - why do we leave the comfort and warmth of our homes to sit in a rickety hut?
The torah tells us - basukot teshvu shivat yamim lemaan yedu dorotechem ki besukot hoshavti et benei yeisrael - You should sit in sukkot in order for all generations to remember that Hashem took us out of mitzraim in sukkot.
But what exactly are we commemorating? The gemara offers 2 opinions - The first opinion says that Sukkot represent the ananey hakavod - we know that when we left mitrayim there were six clouds - one on each side and top and bottom, plus one cloud leading us. The other opinion says no - we are commemorating Sukkot mamash - each family had their own Sukkot and we sit in Sukkot today to commemorate those Sukkot.
In either case - whether it is clouds or huts, we see that they provided very flimsy protection - so the real protection came from Hashem. So Sukkot is a commemoration of Hashem's protection.
But what exactly is a commemoration? The goyim have a concept of commemoration - Abraham Lincoln's birthday is Feb 12 and Washington's birthday is Feb 22, so they commemorate both with President's Day - which they make at a convenient time in between. Or Martin Luther King - Ish Tzaddik haya bedorotav - so they want to commemorate his birthday so they choose a convenient day near his birthday.
In Judaism we don't have that flexibility - because the day we celebrate is invested with a certain kedusha - a power - that cycles back every year on that day.
So every year on the tenth of tishrei we celebrate Yom Kippur because that day has the power to pray for teshuva. And every year on Pesach we have the power to pray for redemption from our personal slavery. And similarly on Sukkot we have the power to pray for Hashem's protection.
For the past 3 years we have been experiencing a terrible recession - some call it a depression. The Obama administration announced this week that the recession is over but I find that a very suspicious announcement 6 weeks before interim elections. And I don't see any evidence of it - unemployment is still raging and real estate values are at an all time low.
So what can we do? The answer is that we can use these days of Sukkot to pray for heavenly protection. But that is not enough - we also have to make some small gesture. We know that when Hashem selected Moshe Rabenu to be the savior of Israel he gave him one test - he revealed himself in the burning bush and Moshe had to just turn to contemplate the bush. That was the gesture Hashem required and he made Moshe the savior.
So what gesture can we do? Well, we just finished Yom Kippur and we read the Viduy Hagadol. Why not go through the Viduy Hagadol Aleph through Taf of the Lavim or Aleph through Taf of the Assey's and find something that you are not doing and make a kabala to start that.
Or I can offer some suggestions - why not get a copy of the Mishna Berurah or Mesilat Yesharim - the Path of the Just by Rabbi Moshe Hayim Luzzato - and put it in your tefilin case. Then read a half a page every day. I guarantee you it will be life altering.
I once read a story about Rabbi Yaakov Yosef Herman - Someone came to him who was besides himself with anguish - he said Rabbi - I am running the same store as my father, but I am smarter and more sophisticated than my father, my prices are better I run the store better, and yet he was very successful and I am barely surviving. The Rabbi asked him - what do you do when there are no customers in the store - he answered - well I do paper work - I have a business to run and it is not just about the customers. The Rabbi then asked him - what did your father do when there were no customers? He learned his Torah. Aha the Rabbi answered - now I understand - when the Satan saw your father learning he had to send in customers to stop him. But with you the Satan is perfectly happy with you the way you are.
So learning Torah is one gesture. Or I have another one.
This Rabbi Ezran is not just a Rabbi. If you ask me he is of the Gedolei hador.
He left his family and his thriving community in Los Angeles to build your community. But he is not just your Rabbi - he cooks for you - he buys your lulavim for you. I looked at some of the etrogim he bought and each one is perfect. I know it takes me one hour to find one good etrog and here he has bought perfect etrogim for an entire community. You know he didn't just ask the etrog man for a bunch of etrogim - rather he picked each one carefully so that his congregation would have the best.
Yet I have been here for the last 3 nights for Mincha and each night this Rabbi had to pray without a minyan because there were only 8 or 9 people. And the pity is that just 15 minutes later the minyan came - but mincha time is before sunset and so the minyan was lost. Why not make a kabalah to come to shul 15 minutes earlier so that this Rabbi can have his minyan?
Let us use these precious remaining days of Sukkot to pray for protection from Hashem and to renew our commitment to Torah and Mitzvot. Let our children see that our commitment to Torah is not negotiable.
And in return let Hashem shower us with protection and parnasah, good health and happiness for ourselves, our families, our community and all of klal yisrael Amen.
We are in the days of Sukkot and the question begs to be asked - why do we sit in a sukkah - why do we leave the comfort and warmth of our homes to sit in a rickety hut?
The torah tells us - basukot teshvu shivat yamim lemaan yedu dorotechem ki besukot hoshavti et benei yeisrael - You should sit in sukkot in order for all generations to remember that Hashem took us out of mitzraim in sukkot.
But what exactly are we commemorating? The gemara offers 2 opinions - The first opinion says that Sukkot represent the ananey hakavod - we know that when we left mitrayim there were six clouds - one on each side and top and bottom, plus one cloud leading us. The other opinion says no - we are commemorating Sukkot mamash - each family had their own Sukkot and we sit in Sukkot today to commemorate those Sukkot.
In either case - whether it is clouds or huts, we see that they provided very flimsy protection - so the real protection came from Hashem. So Sukkot is a commemoration of Hashem's protection.
But what exactly is a commemoration? The goyim have a concept of commemoration - Abraham Lincoln's birthday is Feb 12 and Washington's birthday is Feb 22, so they commemorate both with President's Day - which they make at a convenient time in between. Or Martin Luther King - Ish Tzaddik haya bedorotav - so they want to commemorate his birthday so they choose a convenient day near his birthday.
In Judaism we don't have that flexibility - because the day we celebrate is invested with a certain kedusha - a power - that cycles back every year on that day.
So every year on the tenth of tishrei we celebrate Yom Kippur because that day has the power to pray for teshuva. And every year on Pesach we have the power to pray for redemption from our personal slavery. And similarly on Sukkot we have the power to pray for Hashem's protection.
For the past 3 years we have been experiencing a terrible recession - some call it a depression. The Obama administration announced this week that the recession is over but I find that a very suspicious announcement 6 weeks before interim elections. And I don't see any evidence of it - unemployment is still raging and real estate values are at an all time low.
So what can we do? The answer is that we can use these days of Sukkot to pray for heavenly protection. But that is not enough - we also have to make some small gesture. We know that when Hashem selected Moshe Rabenu to be the savior of Israel he gave him one test - he revealed himself in the burning bush and Moshe had to just turn to contemplate the bush. That was the gesture Hashem required and he made Moshe the savior.
So what gesture can we do? Well, we just finished Yom Kippur and we read the Viduy Hagadol. Why not go through the Viduy Hagadol Aleph through Taf of the Lavim or Aleph through Taf of the Assey's and find something that you are not doing and make a kabala to start that.
Or I can offer some suggestions - why not get a copy of the Mishna Berurah or Mesilat Yesharim - the Path of the Just by Rabbi Moshe Hayim Luzzato - and put it in your tefilin case. Then read a half a page every day. I guarantee you it will be life altering.
I once read a story about Rabbi Yaakov Yosef Herman - Someone came to him who was besides himself with anguish - he said Rabbi - I am running the same store as my father, but I am smarter and more sophisticated than my father, my prices are better I run the store better, and yet he was very successful and I am barely surviving. The Rabbi asked him - what do you do when there are no customers in the store - he answered - well I do paper work - I have a business to run and it is not just about the customers. The Rabbi then asked him - what did your father do when there were no customers? He learned his Torah. Aha the Rabbi answered - now I understand - when the Satan saw your father learning he had to send in customers to stop him. But with you the Satan is perfectly happy with you the way you are.
So learning Torah is one gesture. Or I have another one.
This Rabbi Ezran is not just a Rabbi. If you ask me he is of the Gedolei hador.
He left his family and his thriving community in Los Angeles to build your community. But he is not just your Rabbi - he cooks for you - he buys your lulavim for you. I looked at some of the etrogim he bought and each one is perfect. I know it takes me one hour to find one good etrog and here he has bought perfect etrogim for an entire community. You know he didn't just ask the etrog man for a bunch of etrogim - rather he picked each one carefully so that his congregation would have the best.
Yet I have been here for the last 3 nights for Mincha and each night this Rabbi had to pray without a minyan because there were only 8 or 9 people. And the pity is that just 15 minutes later the minyan came - but mincha time is before sunset and so the minyan was lost. Why not make a kabalah to come to shul 15 minutes earlier so that this Rabbi can have his minyan?
Let us use these precious remaining days of Sukkot to pray for protection from Hashem and to renew our commitment to Torah and Mitzvot. Let our children see that our commitment to Torah is not negotiable.
And in return let Hashem shower us with protection and parnasah, good health and happiness for ourselves, our families, our community and all of klal yisrael Amen.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Tips for a successful marriage
Delivered at the Sheva Berachot - Oct 2009, of my son Yaakob Grazi and my daughter in law Gloria Grazi
Rabbi Miller once said never give advice to your son in law. But he didn’t say son and he didn’t say daughter in law. So I would like to offer some advice to my son and my new daughter in law. These are tips that I have learned about marriage over the years.
Some I read, some I heard, some I learned the hard way
These are not halacha le'moshe misinai - they are just logic - but svara is also d'oraita so maybe they are!
1. Yaakob - Remember the door-knob. When you come home, let the doorknob be a reminder that you are leaving the outside world and coming into your home
2. People will tell you marriage is compromise. That is not true. Marriage is complete and total submission, Never expect more than that, and learn to love it!
3. Before you sit on the bed, always feel with your hand if the other person’s feet are in the way.
4. When you remove jewelry to wash, put it between your lips until you wash, then put it back on your finger then say beracha. You might be able to buy new jewelry but you can never replace the sentiment.
5. You love each other and you will always love each other. But that doesn’t mean there won’t be arguments. No matter how serious the argument, never ever ever use the “D” word.
6. Never say anything that will have a permanent consequences. You can show anger, but never be angry.
7. Never go to bed with an argument
8. Never be too proud to say I am sorry, I was wrong. Even if you know you are 100% right
9. Here is an important one - Driver gets to pick the music!
10. Give each other 100% of your time, and then leave over 100% for each of your children
11. Ask Hashem for help constantly. He really does hear and he really does answer.
12. Love each other with all your hearts – say it to each other often. And mean it!
13. Don’t be casual with your word. Deliver what you promise.
Rabbi Miller once said never give advice to your son in law. But he didn’t say son and he didn’t say daughter in law. So I would like to offer some advice to my son and my new daughter in law. These are tips that I have learned about marriage over the years.
Some I read, some I heard, some I learned the hard way
These are not halacha le'moshe misinai - they are just logic - but svara is also d'oraita so maybe they are!
1. Yaakob - Remember the door-knob. When you come home, let the doorknob be a reminder that you are leaving the outside world and coming into your home
2. People will tell you marriage is compromise. That is not true. Marriage is complete and total submission, Never expect more than that, and learn to love it!
3. Before you sit on the bed, always feel with your hand if the other person’s feet are in the way.
4. When you remove jewelry to wash, put it between your lips until you wash, then put it back on your finger then say beracha. You might be able to buy new jewelry but you can never replace the sentiment.
5. You love each other and you will always love each other. But that doesn’t mean there won’t be arguments. No matter how serious the argument, never ever ever use the “D” word.
6. Never say anything that will have a permanent consequences. You can show anger, but never be angry.
7. Never go to bed with an argument
8. Never be too proud to say I am sorry, I was wrong. Even if you know you are 100% right
9. Here is an important one - Driver gets to pick the music!
10. Give each other 100% of your time, and then leave over 100% for each of your children
11. Ask Hashem for help constantly. He really does hear and he really does answer.
12. Love each other with all your hearts – say it to each other often. And mean it!
13. Don’t be casual with your word. Deliver what you promise.
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